Medical Office Assistant Job Description

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Assisting Your Parents With Their Marriage

Posted on April 7th, 2016 by Richard Necaise

Few children think too much about their parents’ marriage until things start to go wrong. Many children of happily married couples just assumed that it’s just a matter of nature. The earth revolves around the sun and their parents are inseparable from one another. This may be the case in some theoretical utopia but almost every child has to realize that every marriage has ups and downs and some never recover from their downs. That’s why many of us end up facing the prospect of our parents entering into divorce counselling.
If you’ve ever tried to help someone else you probably know that there’s only so much you can do. You can’t step in and fix a marriage like you would a house or a car. What you need to do is focus on the role you’ve learned to play as you’ve grown up. As we grow up we begin to relate to our parents as fellow human beings instead of god-like figures who might as well belong to another race. The beauty of this relationship is that you can be there for them the way you’re there for your friends, offering them a friendly ear. Just avoid the temptation of trying to act as a therapist or a judge, try to show them kindness while directing them toward capable therapists.
Take a realistic look at your parents’ marriage. Many mothers and fathers spend a lot of energy trying to hide their struggles from their children so many times the children have a distorted view of the relationship their parents have. You need to ask yourself the hard questions if you want to have a chance of helping anyone. Do you think both parties involved are doing what they can to keep the marriage going? As uncomfortable as it may be to admit oftentimes one parent has abandoned their responsibilities as a spouse. You might find yourself admitting to yourself that “my father needs depression counselling in Castle Hill to teach him how to be a husband. ” This shouldn’t be taken as a license to take sides and gang up on one parent or the other but it’s necessary if you want to know what’s wrong with the marriage so you can assist your parents with fixing things.
Realize when it’s no longer your problem. While it’s true that a divorce will probably have a big impact on you and any siblings you have in the end that doesn’t make everything your problem. Ultimately a marriage comes down to the relationship between two people and only they can decide how all of this turns out. You can recommend couples, divorce or separation counselling but in the end they are the ones who have to go and talk to each other.
Anyone who has tried to improve themselves knows it’s hard enough to change the way you are, helping others is even harder. That’s why we have trained psychologist, and even they can’t necessarily save a marriage. So when you see trouble seek out help by telling people “my friend needs support” but don’t feel like you need to take on personal responsibility. Hopefully you can help your parents repair their marriage but in the end your main goal needs to be showing that you are there as their loving child.

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